Germany-France, European Championship, semi-final. If the mere words don't get blood fizzing, brain pulsing and soul rushing, check yourself into the nearest mortuary: you might be an ex-person.

Germany have started again, Boateng drilling a luscious ball to Hector on the touchline. He moves it onto Draxler, but Sissoko is in and outmuscles him, charging clear in possession, so is duly nailed by a flying, twisting Dhalsim of a tackle. Draxler is booked.

Pogba finds Giroud at inside-left, and he delays his shot for no reason, hitting it into Kimmich's ankles. But France keep up the pressure and Griezmann darts a low pass into the aforementioned Giroud - he holds up and lays off to complete the one-two, but the shot is deflected wide. For a second, it looks as though the corner will spin onto Pogba's forehead, but an earlier deflection takes it away from him.

For the sake of the game, a Germany goal might have been better - it's hard to imagine the second half looking much different from the first, as it goes.

It seems that Ozil was booked in the pre-penalty stramash for kicking the ball away, and he kicks-off.

The players are back, no changes made.

Laugh!

Germany will feel aggrieved - they probably don't think it was a penalty, when what it was was a brilliant decision by the ref. Schweinsteiger went up with his hand, it hit his hand, what more do you want?

Germany will also feel aggrieved to be behind, but the fact is they haven't scored, and they haven't come that close either.

Half-time: Germany 0-1 France. Well, that's fairly amusing.

GOAL! GERMANY 0-1 FRANCE (GRIEZMANN, PEN) Griezmann ambles up to the ball like it's nothing and slots into the left corner, left-footed, about halfway up. That was cooler than Fonzie.

Again, Evra gets down the left - he's obviously had enough of doing being bypassed - and a long cross is headed behind for no reason by Howedes. The corner comes over, Schweinsteiger is up with Evra, AND THAT'S A PENALTY! SCHWEINSTEIGER'S ARM WAS UP! HE'S BOOKED!

Evra trips Kroos, school corridor-style, and is booked.

Olivier Giroud is a silly billy. A mix-up in centrefield sends him alone through the middle, and without the pace to get away, Howedes gains on him. But Griezmann is alongside! But he ignores him to be tackled instead! Great defending, dunderheaded attacking.

The first bit of France in a while Umtiti slotting a ball between Kimmich and Can for Evra. He takes it inside with his first touch, then finds Griezmann, who, from a narrow angle, humps a shot into the side-netting.

France never quite recover from Matuidi's error, and Germany win a corner down the left. Kroos swings it into the middle, and Schweinsteiger gets goalside of and a run on Pogba. Pogba does just enough in falling into him to prevent a free header, and the ref is having none of the penalty appeals.

Matuidi takes a square ball from Evra and passes it straight to Muller, who doesn't have the pace to run at anyone, so dribbles to the edge of the box and drags a low cross shot that Lloris dives for when he might otherwise have allowed it to go wide, or walked over to it and picked it up.

I've just seen Olivier Giroud, I swear it!

...and this time it's Pogba, over the wall again and to Neuer's right again. He catches it on his nose and turns it into a lawnmower.

Pogba wriggles between Muller and Kroos, winning a free-kick, and France build. Koscielny nips a smart low pass into Griezmann on the half-turn, who runs straight at Can, who chops him down. Booking, and another free-kick, 25 yards out and dead centre. The same chaps cluster around the ball...

For all their 70% possession, Germany haven't really made a proper chance. So there's that.