The Warm-Up: European Super League can't come soon enough for Liverpool

This week has seen much badmouthing of the European Super League concept. The latest batch of Football Leaks revelations – published in Der Spiegel – names five Premier League clubs among 11 permanent teams in a proposed format that could start in 2021.

As founder members, these 11 sides, would of course be immune to relegation.

Some paint this as elitist; a protectionist racket designed to safeguard the riches of the few, mocking the very essence of competition.

The Warm-Up must (pretend to) disagree. How can you oppose this new initiative when you see the plight of poor Liverpool?

Doesn’t last night’s defeat at Red Star Belgrade show exactly why Jurgen Klopp’s men merit their place among an untouchable elite? Why should their progress be hindered by the insignificant detail of losing football matches?

They’ve lifted the European Cup five times! Not for a while, admittedly. In fact, they haven’t won much of anything in the last decade. But they’ve reached some finals, which means they’ve got some really kick-ass pennants in their club museum. And candidly, there’s no greater honour than playing the anonymous henchman to Real Madrid’s James Bond.

They deserve to compete – and what’s more, we deserve them. Each European night at Anfield is the most extraordinary occasion in football history, each more special than the last. Hear how they sing! See how they wave their awkwardly-worded banners! Would you deny us this spectacle just because they can’t win their games? Won’t somebody think of the half-and-half scarf industry?

Of course, it’s not just Liverpool. The socialist lunatics at UEFA are threatening to kick Manchester United out of this season’s competition for the so-called ‘crime’ of finishing behind Juventus and Valencia in Group H. Pah!

Don’t those Trotskyists realise the only thing more special than a United-Juve clash is the same match where both teams are guaranteed to go through? Let them play without fear of consequences! Let the stakes be lowered so we can all focus on the real business of honouring Cristiano Ronaldo!

Sure, these days United are as much fun to watch as a Yale lock installation guide - but don’t they deserve credit for all the years they weren’t a raging dumpster fire? Are we to discard them and their vast money-making prowess the moment their performance dips?

Frankly, we’re not sure there isn’t a human rights issue at play here. Many kids support Manchester United. Seeing them knocked out of tournaments is deeply traumatic. These youths deserve better than to see their club’s incompetence callously exposed.

Bring on the European Super League. Do it for the children.

Tottenham, of course, are not part of the club. If they think developing young players and spending within their means is a way to success, Manchester City’s FFP lawyers will be happy to demonstrate otherwise.

For now, though, their participation in the Champions League is grudgingly accepted. And their progress, rather crudely in The Warm-Up’s view, depends on their results. On such outdated basis, Harry Kane may just have kept Spurs in the competition with two late goals to beat PSV 2-1 at Wembley.

Kane spent the first part of the season looking utterly exhausted. Nobody has looked more in need of a rest since David Walliams made landfall near Calais.

Yet Mauricio Pochettino did not give his star man a break. For Poch is a man of principle. He lives by the slogan “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. This motto was put to the test in Kane’s early-season struggles, and at one point it genuinely looked like it could go either way.

But now it seems he has come out the other side, powered only by Pro Plus and luminous energy drinks. Now he is galvanised and ready to play 100 games a season. Don’t say it can’t happen.

It’s always the foreign swear words you learn first.

I wouldn’t make the same mistakes again, says man who spent more than a decade making the same mistakes over and over again.

‘Here’s something Scholesy taught us when I was in the youth team’

It’s often asked why more players don’t go into management. Frankly, The Warm-Up wants to know why any of them do. For your own sake, get back in the Sky studio, Titi.

Happy 51st birthday to David Guetta, who earned an obscene sum of money doing this at the Euro 2016 opening ceremony. Well, not this exactly... but the parody was definitely better than the real thing.

Juventus v Manchester United is the pick of tonight's Champions League crop, while Manchester City take on Shakhtar Donetsk and Real Madrid face the inconvenience of having to play Viktoria Plzen when Europe's top clubs would probably rather the Czech champions just stand there in silent awe.